Maria Arpa
This week
What is your normal
Plus…
Maria’s Midweek Mindfulness
and
The Wednesday Whisper
Boundaries and tolerances
Something I’ve know for a long time, yet still eludes me in practice from time to time, is what we normalise. I’m clear that I have become pretty adept at knowing what I will and won’t put up with and communicating it. Even then, I can find myself in a situation allowing something different.
The question is what am I normalising?
Many of us normalise conflict behaviour that is disturbing, even in our closest relationships and even from ourselves to others. I see the bar set very high for the realisation that what is being acted out is not OK
In the week’s blog, I’m asking you to reset the bar to a much lower level. This includes monitoring our own behaviour. It is not asking you weaponise or attack someone for breaching your boundary. It is asking you to become present moment by moment and feel what is moving inside you to the point where you can identify harm much earlier, speak about it compassionately and choose what to change.
Remember, ‘hurt feelings’ is not a breach, but continuously allowing yourself to be treated in a way that damages trust, may cause harm to the very relationship you seek to preserve. Hurt feelings is an early warning system that we can use to explore where the hurt comes from.
Maria’s Midweek Mindfulness
The DRM gets us to look in the mirror and recognise that we have more power to change things than we allow ourselves once we can identify the source of the behaviour.
The Wednesday Whisper
What have you normalised? How will you address it?
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